i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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