I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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