The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My cat gives me a boner
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
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