There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
