If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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