dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
