I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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