'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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