Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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