Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
