Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
