Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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