who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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