like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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