even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
