I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
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