Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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