am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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