What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
