Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
