I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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