What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she looked like the before picture.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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