i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
