Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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