i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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