I think my fart just growled at me.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize