does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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