I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Randomize
