I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
