remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
