proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize