I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
