Me too!
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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