So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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