Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
