How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Randomize
