i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
He has the fingertips of a God
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