Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
So much Jack, so little girl.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Randomize
