my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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