oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize