is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize