Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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