Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
