Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
