i don't like sucking hair
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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