i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Randomize