So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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