you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
i think my cat just said my name.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
