Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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