Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
