i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
